Tuesday, December 30, 2008

The Snow..

Amidst the delicate beauty

of God's creation

joy dances in the leaves

awe tastes the breath of nature

and there is a sweet soft sadness

in the beauty of the snow....

Sunday, December 28, 2008

God Talk

I attended a thought provoking church service this morn. ... though I stumble and fall at times, and I strive to always live life fervently, I am so very human. Yet it is my faith that is the driving force of my life. The pastor talked this morning of the voice of God and how too often we don't open the door to hearing His will and word. I have personally known, felt and witnessed the overwhemling word of God, sometimes very subtlely, and at others times as if the Good Lord were shouting from a mountain top. ... Yet too I am mindful that perhaps at times amidst my desire to share my heart, my thoughts, and my gentle questions, I haven't paused enough to "listen" to God talk. ... So often within my heart, my joys, my sadnesses, my fervency, I want to talk, to pray, yet sometimes in the depths of conversation with God, I fail to really listen. ... I am hopeful in the coming year amidst the love of life, those most loved, and the Good Lord, I will take more time to listen, to "God Talk". There is such beauty in the journey, and in the ability to sit down to talk with God about anything at all. Sometimes in the depths of the heart, we just need to pause and listen to God's peace, solace, and gentle whisper. ... How beautiful the ability to think, to feel, to cry, to laugh, and to love. How beautiful the journey in conversation with the Good Lord. ... How beautiful to share one's innermost heart and tenderest of questions... and to pause, to listen, to hear...

God's gentle whisper

...Prayers and warmth to anyone who may visit.

Sleep- Hormones and the Nature of the Mind-Body & Soul


Sleep, a solace to all mortals
Sleep, to some so natural
Sleep, to many so elusive
Sleep, to some so simple
Sleep, to some a real struggle
Sleep, for some, bountiful to envy
Sleep, for some, commodity to buy
Sleep, in it some walk riskily
Sleep, in it some talk profusely
Sleep, a gift to all human beings
Sleep, a basic necessity of life
Sleep well, wake up refreshed,
Step on to face daily challenges.

Rangarajan Kazhiryum Mannar

Information from this post and the poll cited taken from the National Sleep Foundation: http://www.sleepfoundation.org/site/c.huIXKjM0IxF/b.2417141/k.27D9/Home_of_the_Sleep_in_America_Poll.htm

I ponder this early morn on the delicate & resilient walk as the Good Lord created us with such incredible complexity. Though I tend to consider myself a good sleeper, perhaps those most close to me tease about my sleep habits, as does my daughter who says I need "5 minutes".. truth be told I need about 6 hours, yet on vacation I am more likely to have a few days that span an entire 8 hours of time. Yet perhaps once a month I am rendered sleepless either if I am deep in thought, awaken by matters of the heart, awaken in pain-- particularly if the body is not in a state of homeostasis, or if I am just plain "not tired". ...

So I contemplate just now my current state of sleeplessness as perhaps a combination of thought, heart twinges, gentle questions and contemplations on life's journey, and a drop in Estrogen render me in a sleepless state. ... It boggles the mind that the mere failure to take my pill last night, would a few hours later awaken me in pain thus calling to the body to get up and take care of the self. ... Is not God's creation so wonderous, complex and mystical? ... I consider the power of sleep... According to a National Poll, at least half of all Americans experience some form of sleep disorder or insomnia each week. The mere thought boggles the mind, yet too perhaps amidst the numerous studies we prescribe sleep to folks and yet I do believe we all have unique needs for sleep and that it is far too simplistic to identify the precise amount of sleep needed for all persons, just as it is minimalistic to prescribe the exact diet. ... Yes, studies show less than 5 or more the 9 hours on average may lead to numerous health problems, yet the difference of 5 & 9 is substantial and I myself know that there are times I need 6, and times I need 8... so I listen to the body. I too have come to realize it makes no sense for me to lay in bed if I am rendered sleepless, I find if I get up, even for a half hour to an hour and drink tea and do something productive yet not too active (i.e. like visit a journal or blog :-) )... I am far more likely to either go back to sleep, or to feel productive for the next day, thus, I visit just now.

As I contemplate God's delicate yet resilient creation, I too think of the power of hormones. ... Though perhaps I contemplated whether to publicly post this on a blog, or more privately in my journal, I consider... why the contemplation? We all have hormones! ... I first hand witness the effects of low estrogen as it often renders me in pain, or affects cognition, mood, and other areas of daily performance. Though I am one to always hold to faith, hope, love and optimism, I too feel very deeply, and I am mindful that at times hormones perhaps bring me even more into touch with depth of thought and feeling in a unique way. As this Christmas has brought such joy in the visiting of friends, and last night with my side of the family, it too has brought sadnesses that touch the heart and at times the most tender of places. ..... Yet what a gift God gave us, in the ability to feel, to hope, to think, to contemplate, to cry, to laugh, and to love. Though perhaps better saved for another day, or a more personal blog space, ... I revisit a deep conversation with Mikaela and my aunt last night amidst dinner. Sandy has always been my favorite aunt and I have many fond memories of going to visit her and her partner(s) over the years. She was always a forward thinking woman who loved life, adventure, and like many on our side of the family was into sports, health and fitness long before it became "vogue". ...

Sandy spoke of being "true to the self"... and "true to the heart", something I have pondered deeply and spoken to God about numerous times over the past week. ... As she spoke, I witnessed my beautiful daughter take in her words as a sponge as she later said, "that was one of my favorite conversations we've had with your family... and so true". Though I did not speak many words in response,... I too gently stated, ... yes, dear, sometimes our greatest challenge and joy is finding that which we believe, who we are, and what lies in the depths of the heart....

So I close my random blog created in the early morn hours, contemplating the delicate yet resilient creation and dynamic interplay of the mind-body-spirit. ... Yes, some we may logically explain through science, yet contemplation of our unique make up, and matters of life, reason, faith and love, go way beyond science and venture into the spiritual realm.

Yeah, life is perplexing sometimes... and certainly isn't logical

but what a wonderous creation the Good Lord painted....

'Pure logic is the ruin of the spirit.'
Antoine de Saint-ExupŽry

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Christmas thoughts...

photo courtesy http://www.savingadvice.com/

As I just posted a comment on a friend's blog yet it hasn't yet shown up. I found it ironic that his post was somewhat akin to that which I planned to post. ... As Christmas is upon us, I am mindful of the waves of time as the Holiday celebrations of Christmas span through the years, yet the nature of the celebration changes as we age and the relationships in our life grow, change, and too reflect the passing of time.

Celebrations used to be large family gatherings as I grew up... yet I am mindful as my grandparents have all ventured on to the great Heavenly hiway, and especially since my brother died, Christmas just isn't the same... yet certainly still has its own beauty.

Is it not interesting how Christmas, the celebration of the most beautiful gift, brings feelings of love, joy, and yet too perhaps sadness in the missing of those loved? .... Sometimes beauty is not only reflected in that which we hold most dear and in the love in our hearts. ... yet too there is beauty in the tender twinges that grace the heart... because though sadness sometimes comes in the missing, what beauty in that the missing reflects a love in our hearts.

Blessings to anyone who may visit,

you are always welcome to comment

Merry Christmas

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Funny how the tender...

As I visited tonight the home of one of three people in my life whom I have considered soul mates, I couldn't help but consider the special nature of the Christmas season and how it brings the deepest tendernesses of the heart. There is such joy in the message of Christmas; such joy in the gift of Christmas. Yet too there sometimes are sweet tinges of those we miss, those who have gone on before us, and in considering those who struggle this time of year. As Christmas eve is upon us, my heart's wishes are for beauty and peace to gently wash the nation and the world, and for the happiness of those most dearly loved. ... Perhaps the heart feels drawn to post in my more personal journal just now-- yet too, sometimes tendernesses and that which is held in the heart and soul transcends words. ...

Yet how beautiful the transcendent

how beautiful the gentle touch of Christmas

Friday, December 19, 2008


As I sit here on a break from some work projects, I listen to the soft sound of the rain beating against the window. I am mindful of how often rain gets a "bad rap" as folks equate it with dreary weather. Yet isn't it true that the nourishing quench of rain is the foundation of the beauty in the greenery that adorns nature? I think of a beautiful poem from the late, great Pulitzer Prize poet Conrad Aiken. I have always loved many of Conrad's poems. ... and perhaps they remind me of the beauty of Mary Oliver's writings on nature. ...

I share one of Conrad's poems here:

Beloved, Let Us Once More Praise The Rain by Conrad Aiken

Beloved, let us once more praise the rain.
Let us discover some new alphabet,
For this, the often praised; and be ourselves,
The rain, the chickweed, and the burdock leaf,
The green-white privet flower, the spotted stone,
And all that welcomes the rain; the sparrow too,

—Who watches with a hard eye from seclusion,
Beneath the elm-tree bough, till rain is done.
There is an oriole who, upside down,
Hangs at his nest, and flicks an orange wing,

—Under a tree as dead and still as lead;
There is a single leaf, in all this heaven
Of leaves, which rain has loosened from its twig:
The stem breaks, and it falls, but it is caught
Upon a sister leaf, and thus she hangs;
There is an acorn cup, beside a mushroom
Which catches three drops from the stooping cloud.
The timid bee goes back to the hive;
the fly Under the broad leaf of the hollyhock
Perpends stupid with cold; the raindark snail
Surveys the wet world from a watery stone...

And still the syllables of water whisper:
The wheel of cloud whirs slowly: while we wait In the dark room;
and in your heart I find One silver raindrop,—on a hawthorn leaf,
— Orion in a cobweb, and the World.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

Just a Thought...

I am mindful that no matter what transpires in the day..

no matter the sad news, uncertainties, or stumblings...

We can always go above the clouds

and see the sun shining!!!


Kringle- Song- And a Perpetual Poet at Heart

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Perhaps it is Time..

Is it not interesting how the Internet has connected the global community in a way we could have never envisioned 2 decades ago? As I embark on yet another journal / blog spot, I am mindful of the power of connections with those we know in our daily lives, and those we have never met. ... I stop to ponder how I will incorporate this blog in with my other personal/ connected journals as well as a hard copy journal I have maintained since I was 9 years old. ...

The poetic journey again begins!!